The Vatican has put together an upbeat, modernized version of the seven deadly sins for Catholics to fret about (link – the first seven still count p.s.). They include questionable scientific experimentation, genetic manipulation, and polluting the environment. Naturally I thought, “If the Vatican can do it, why can’t I?”
And why can’t you?
Here is my list of modern and remixed sins everyone should be absolved of one day:
- Thou shalt neither be hip nor square, only penitent.
- Thou shalt not inflict poverty or wear condoms, but AIDS is cool.
- Thou shalt not die for false idols; we’ve got it covered.
- Thou shalt not wait for the entire chorus of “
I ranIn Da Club” to play on your cell phone before answering it.
- Thou shalt not mix oranges and toothpaste
- Thou shalt not, under any circumstances, use “Lol” or “brb” colloquially….ever
Any other ideas?